Freely Receive

It’s corrosive, this feeling that penetrates to the deepest parts of who I am. Having almost everything ripped away from me has left my feet nowhere to rest, my soul no calm haven in which to allow itself to feel restored. But restoration, those drops of heavenly dew that might alight upon me if only I am still, if only I am patient enough to give the ragged pieces permission to heal, can be freely received into my waiting palm. Only then do I realize the gentle, tender, warm rain is already falling. The landscape before me is as brightly colored as it is in my memories; I had merely forgotten and imagined a black and white arid land, without comfort, compassion or freedom. 
Today I choose to be free. 
Today I choose infinite love. 
Today I choose restoration. 



The trees are swaying in the breeze and I try to stand steadily in the gale, but the only thing holding my attention  is the hand that I hold. It’s an odd combination of sunshine and gusts. He is perfection and the sun appears to emanate from his eyes. Looking up, I’m not entirely convinced that I’m imagining it. The clouds of the past are gone and I know that it’s time to start thinking about all that is to come. Without words spoken, I understand how safe and loved I am in this moment and it propels me into forever. Anything is possible and I mean that in the best of ways. Someone used to say that to me in a menacing tone, but those memories are as over as the cloudy skies. Anything means everything good, edifying and life-giving. 

Long Time!

I’m currently between projects but a little horrified at how long it’s taken me to post an update here. I’m so sorry for my lack of writing discipline.

Being part of the JuNoWriMo crew was everything I hoped it would be and more. I plan on helping on the crew every year. This time I worked on social media for the Twitter account, which basically meant promoting the project and finding new writers to join us. It was so much fun because I love meeting new writers and watching them experience the beautiful camaraderie that is JuNoWriMo. Being in a group with other creative people as we journey through our thirty days of writing madness is unlike anything else. I was rather disappointed when the month was over!

I would like to start a new project to keep things from going stagnant from now till NaNo in November but haven’t decided on anything specific. My summer projects were all smaller works blended together, so this might make a better platform than what I’ve done in previous years.

How have you spent your summer?

Quote Challenge Day 1

Thank you, Heena, so much for nominating me for the Quote Challenge! I will post a quote for three days and nominate three people each day to do the same. Here goes!

“The future belongs to those who believe in the beauty of their dreams.” Eleanor Roosevelt

Today I nominate: BlondeWriteMore, AnaSpoke and SavingSavannah

If any of the nominees have already done the challenge or are too busy, that’s ok! 

Post Nano Planning

Now that NaNoWriMo 2015 is finished, I need to edit my 52,000 word draft. It’s the first time that I’ve written a complete story all in the 50K required for a win, but as I think back over the previous month, I know I have a lot of editing to do. My goal is to flesh out the characters, from appearance to more about their backgrounds and mannerisms. I believe that the flashback and flash forward style works because I enjoy reading stories like that myself. To move chronologically from beginning to end would bore me with my particular storyline. It works beautifully with certain storylines, though! 

I’ve also had much less time to write as I make my Christmas preparations. Last night I finished my entire card list in one sitting and am very pleased to have completed it in that way! Little by little, the things I need to do are getting done. 

So much of what I’ve been able to accomplish has been done through my new Theory Of Five Minutes. Too often I find myself wasting time in the day because I don’t use my spare, waiting, in between times to do anything useful. A few story ideas jotted down in five minutes, a note written, a stack of papers organized, it all makes a difference. Of course, it’s always important to find time to relax, even if for only five minutes!

I wish you all a good day, may you be productive and happy. 

After Closing

She sat at the piano in the half light. Thinking she was alone, she let her fingers glide over the keys as though they had a mind of their own, playing the song by reflex instead of thought. She remembered him with every stroke of the keys, expressed the melancholy which she fought to hide during the daylight hours with an aching sense of freedom. It was like a prayer rising to the heavens. What light there was had a starkness that made the observer immediately cold, chilled through by its purity and her tears. This is how the body remembers. The thought struck with such subtlety that it was hard for the watcher to recall it later, once the piano had stopped and he knew it was time for him to go unless he wished to be discovered. As he stepped out into the rainy night, he shook his head. I wrote that tune. 

RIP Carey Lander of Camera Obscura

Yesterday morning, keyboardist Carey Lander of the Scottish indie rock band Camera Obscura passed away after battling sarcoma for four years. Carey was 33 years old. She was a great talent and will be greatly missed by her family,  friends, band mates and fans all over the world. In her honor, I’m posting the song that made me fall in love with the band six years ago. 

My Maudlin Career

I’m also including the link to Carey’s fundraising page for sarcoma research, through Just Giving. Please consider donating in order that sarcoma research can be advanced and save lives in the future. It was very important to Carey that this cause be furthered.  

Go here: Carey’s page to further sarcoma research